Need a Change of Physician

I had a 4 month well baby check-up today. Things went pretty well, but not quite what I wanted to hear.


What the Doc Said:
Your son has doubled his weight and seems to be ready for some infant rice cereal, if you wish.

What I wanted to hear:
Just throw a hamburger and french fries into the food processor and feed by bottle. He should sleep 12 hours at night and take a four hour nap.


What the Doc Said:
I'm glad to hear that your 3 year old is not displaying jealousy toward his younger sibling.

What I wanted to hear:
Here's a prescription for your 3 year old. He will now play in his room a lot and also take a 4 hour nap.


What the Doc Said:
Maybe your 4 month old will now learn to be ok by himself, playing on a blanket, etc.

What I wanted to hear:
There is a new program for Moms of two kids. I'll write a prescription for a maid service to come visit your house twice a week. I'll make sure your insurance pays for it and waives the deductible. See you in two months, get some rest.